‘CALL IN FOR A CUDDLE’ ARTICLE FOR ‘ALIVE WITH POSSIBILITY’ MAGAZINE.    APRIL 2020

When ‘this’ happened, just after we had survived the worst bush fires in Australian history, followed by floods which had our home marooned, I asked myself what I could do to make a difference - whilst being in isolation.  I am seventy years old, and for most of my life, I’ve worked with people of all ages around the world, as a trainer, a life coach, a facilitator, a counsellor and a teacher.  I teach children Primary Ethics, and my husband and I work with couples and their relationships.  One of my  passions is working with women to assist them to create their ‘best lives’, and for  the last two years I have facilitated a monthly “Sacred Circle” for women in our community, which has been an extraordinary privilege.

 Don’t get me wrong - I love men!  I’ve been married to Gerald for 51 years, a wonderful man who I adore, and who supports me in all that I do, bless him.

It was clear that none of us really knew how to deal with the uncertainty and fear of what we were facing.  What WERE we facing?   I knew that women need other women – that women need to talk - it’s in our DNA!   So I created a project, “Call In For A Cuddle!”.    Gerald installed Zoom – I’m not technical at all - and we set up a ‘hotline’ for women to call in from 4 – 5 pm each weekday.  I sent out an invitation to the women on my Sacred Circle distribution list, assembled some of my favourite quotes, inspiring poems, gathered information on topics I thought would be useful and interesting and my box of Celtic Blessing Cards.  Not knowing who - or if anyone - would show up, I waited nervously on that first day, wearing what has become my ‘uniform’ - a colourful outfit, make up, and big ear rings.

It’s been astonishing.  

We’ve met every week day for almost six weeks, with between 2 – 10 women on each call, aged from 30 – 70+ years old, some locals, and some from other Australian States.  We share our concerns, we cry, we listen, we complain, we learn, we tell stories, we sing silly songs, we’ve danced and we laugh - we laugh a LOT!   We’ve made new friends, and for those who already knew each other, we have a deeper knowing of each other. Every Tuesday we do a meditation led by one of our local yoga teachers, Gloria Tonggsy, and every Thursday, a Creative Visualisation is led by a healer, Krystene Bartnicki.   

I’ve been moved to tears by the authenticity of these ‘Cuddle Calls’.  I’ve been inspired by women making the very best of their situations, managing financial stress, working from home plus home schooling children, dealing with job loss, depression and loneliness.  They queue for food in supermarkets and deliver meals to the elderly.  They care for their families, they clean and cook and exercise and attend on line classes for cooking, book clubs, yoga, meditation, they attend school conferences and social gatherings, and sadly, some deal with an increase in domestic violence, and alcohol issues.

We’ve shared our stories with tea, coffee and even “Wine on Good Friday!”  It’s a simple but powerful process.  The only rules are confidentiality, no judgements, assessments, or attempts to ‘fix’ anybody else.  We are women, not psychiatrists.  We’re there to listen and understand – we know we need each other like never before.

I think it’s a good sign that our daily calls will probably soon decrease in frequency, as we are all learning different ways to live in this new world.  Our fear is diminishing and our confidence and optimism are growing.   It’s been my privilege to provide a platform for women to love and support each other during this pandemic.  We really are stronger, wiser, more generous and compassionate.   For we are women, connected still – but more tightly bound together.